Friday, 15 July 2011

10 symptoms of Filmaholism

"Filmaholism" is a perilous sickness, if you find yourself affected by any of the following symptoms, please proceed to the nearest film-theater/dvd store:

1- Extreme bouts of mania upon viewing a trailer by a preferred director’s latest film.

2- Unstoppable depression arousing from the dissatisfaction with a work of art.

3- An uncontrollable tendency to over-indulge in terms of cinematic purchases.

4- A vivid refusal of weekend socializing so as not to miss out on a film (dvd or theater)

5- Sheer & utter loathing of lending, giving, donating dvds (aka doing favors) out of fear of losing them from one's personal space.

6- Obsessive compulsive use of’s search engine in order to dig up new films & directors

7- An insurmountable inability to manage or prioritize one's To-Watch list

8- A near-catatonic state during the screening of a film and the ultimate apathy towards the incineration of one’s abode

9- An amazing capacity for reciting film-quotes while in a trance-like state.

10- Seething rage at the inability to recall a name, year or any trivia in reference to a movie.

Does it pretty much summarize it? Please do not ignore your condition. Filmaholism is a dangerous, mind-twisting, nerve-wrenching disease. It is not to be taken lightly. We plead you to take all possible measures to infect your family & friends. An antidote has not yet been discovered and I, for one, am very thankful for it.

1 comment:

ARD said...

I suffer from nine of the symptoms. My watchlist is 8500 titles long and growing. On my best day I watched 14 movies. I think I've surpassed most regular cinephiles.